Miss Contradiction and I spent a boozy lunch slash afternoon on Saturday working out who was going to be who in our lives.
This is what we came up with:
Miss Contradiction's life partner and soulmate: Panda
The executor of her will: The glassie, Joe (?)
Her legal advisor: Uncle Pete
Godparents to her children: Licensee and Poncho
My life partner and soulmate: Ivan Milat
The executor of my will: Jason
Legal advisor: That strange guy who works at Peppercorn
Godparents to my children: Missingham and a woman in a chicken suit.
I sent Jason an SMS to ask him if he would be the executor of my will and he didn't respond.
What's up with that?
Sheesh, you try to build a bridge...
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Update.
Jason agreed to be my executor!!
YAY!! Free ice pipes for all when I kick the bucket!!
Wait - does this mean he gets executed, or am I all mixed up again?
Really? He didn't respond to my message about him, me and Panda being BFF's.
I want Dougie the Pizza Boy to be my spiritual advisor.
Well, he didn't actually respond to me directly. Probably because he doesn't know my email address and something that official does need to be emailed. On his work system.
Bad Smell rang me before because I sent him a text message last night telling him that Melody was the executor of his will and I think he rang to abuse me. So when he rang I told him the whole story. I was laughing like a hyena and attracting stares like you wouldn't believe. He told me that Jason would be my executor.
I could hear Jason's awful droning baritone in the background.
I've changed my mind.
I want Gollum from Lord Of The Rings and Jason to be co-executors.
Hopefully Gollum will be the voice of reason in that partnership.
I will be your soulmate, Town Bike
Wow, no shit andrew, I've visited this blog like twice and I already knew that.
Hahaha. It's funny because it's true.
Andrew, do you really think cutting Ivan Milat's grass is such a good idea?
I thought Jason and Bad Smell weren't mates any more?
They're not best mates but they still work together. And no doubt smoke ice together.
The cooling off probably won't last long. I mean Jason stole $100 off Bad Smell once and they still patched it up after a few weeks.
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