As Miss Contradiction mentioned in an earlier blog entry, we were quite shocked by the high population of losers at the hole on Saturday night (ourselves included).
A 50 year old guy with an annoying whistle shaped like a pair of lips, someone dressed up to look like Gilligan, many women who simply have no idea how to dress themselves: all were out in full force on Saturday night.
Back in the day you weren't allowed into the hole after 9pm in thongs and shorts, however the majority of the clientele appeared to be wearing these wardrobe staples (girls included).
WHEN WILL WOMEN LEARN THAT SHORTS DO NOT WORK AS EVENING WEAR?? JUST BECAUSE FERGIE FROM THE BLACK EYED PEAS WORE A PARTICULAR TREND, IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO!! AND FOR GOD'S SAKE, STICK TO ONE TREND AT ONCE!! IT'S NOT A COMPETITION TO SEE WHO CAN WEAR THE MOST TRENDS IN ONE OUTFIT!!!
But I digress. Anyway the long and the short of it is that we have learned that bouncers have been instructed to let anyone and everyone in due to declining attendance rates. A far cry from the good ol' days, when you could be kicked out at the drop of a hat (as I well know).
So it seems Miss Contradicition and I may have to take matters into our own hands. As we all know, my 80-year-old father (gambler extraordinaire and former western suburbs underworld from the 1970s) has a particular penchant for threatening to put people down the bottom of a well when they cause trouble.
He once threatened to put Jason down a well after he started stalking me for no reason, and ever since then we've been waiting to open the paper one day and see the headline 'EXTRA EXTRA: LOSER FOUND DOWN THE BOTTOM OF LOCAL WELL'. Or even 'ICE DEALER GRIEVES AS BEST CUSTOMER DIES IN TRAGIC WELL ACCIDENT'.
Or 'POKIE SHARE PRICES PLUMMET AS JASON GETS HIS COMEUPPANCE'.
I would like to move that anyone sporting a fashion crime outfit at the pub from now on be put down the bottom of a well. AND THAT INCLUDES FAT PEOPLE WHO INSIST ON WEARING HORIZONTAL STRIPES. HELLO??? IT MAKES YOU LOOK BIGGER... ARE YOU STUPID??
The well pictured above may have to be widened to accommodate some of the wider loads who are known to frequent the establishment.
5 comments:
List of people who should already be in the well;
1. Jason
2. Rocket Rod
3. Slaporn
4. Seconds World Moll
5. The guy who wanted to put 10c down Town Bike's crack
6. Did I mention Jason?
7. Who ever was responsible for the Antler Bar
Some of those people are too good to be trapped in a well with Jason
It seems megas attempt to attract high rollers to "hotel cremorne" has back fired with even less people turning up.
I remember in the good old days when the place would be jam packed full, i havent seen that in a long time.
Gits, hope they go broke!!!!
I do love the pub as it is the closest licensed venue to my home and has alcohol. And Pete.
However times have changed. Miss Contradiction and I used to love nothing better than a random night at the hole.
The place would be so packed that you would see all these random unexpected people at odd times.
Sadly those days are gone.
I have since committed the cardinal fashion sin of wearing shorts as evening wear. Whoops.
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