Monday, 12 January 2009
Pop Quiz
a) A white Good Guys shirt and slacks
b) A white shirt with moss trimming
c) A white shirt covered in a decorative icepipe motif
d) A white goblin costume.
And will Jason's long-lost abandoned child from Queensland be the ring-bearer?
Abandoning one's children in Queensland seems to be all the rage these days.
Only time will tell.
Breaking News! Jason
No, he isn't going to throw himself off The Gap in an amphetamine-induced frenzy. Apparently, on New Year's Eve he made some throwaway comment to Bad Smell asking if he would be his best man. When Bad Smell subsequently asked him what that was all about a couple of days later (Bad Smell is a bit slow on the uptake), Jason proceeded to dodge the question and hasn't mentioned it since.
Will we be invited to the wedding? And how will I be able to tolerate it if I'm not drinking any more? Stay tuned for more...
Monday, 5 January 2009
Shayne Borland, Ye Hardly Gave Us A Chance To Miss Thee
As you can guess from the above title, Shayne Borland is back in town. He made a heroic return to the pub on Boxing Day while Miss Contradiction and I were having a quiet alcohol binge. And when I say heroic, he literally walked in with his hands clasped above his head like a returning hero or prize fighter. He then made a beeline for us. Miss Contradiction was sitting with her back to the door but could tell by my face that something was horribly wrong.
Town Bike: No
SB: Please?
TB: No
SB: OK, can we have sex before I go?
TB: No
SB: Does that men yes?
TB: It means no
SB: So will I see you at Cremorne 2nite?
TB: No